Oh to be sure.

My head and my thoughts are such a detriment, and I cause myself this grief. All I can do is sit here and choke back the words I want to say, while I spit out the words that mean nothing to me. I’m staring into my future hoping to forget my past. I’ll disconnect my heart from my head and try to forget all these memories. It’s all so bitter sweet. There’s things I know and things left unknown. The unknown is what keeps me up at night, I sit here, 3am wondering and thinking. What if when I leave all my worst fears are proven.

Goodbye

I have always wanted to branch out from my family. Moving to another country has always been the one thing that got me through high school and university. It was the obvious path I would take the very minute I graduated. The one thought that never crossed my mind was just how hard it would be to say goodbye. One simple word has all these emotions attached to it. I still have two months before I leave yet pieces of my heart feel like they are already broken. I know it’s only a matter of time before those broken pieces will heel but still, I haven’t even left yet and the thought of leaving is hurting. I know this is what I have to do. I still have so much growing up to do, emotionally and mentally. The biggest thing that hurts was watching my mothers face drop the moment she knew I got my visa, her sadness is what overwhelms me, I know this is all temporary pain but it’s pain nonetheless.

Misspellings

I always sit and wonder why we meet the people we do. Was I put on this earth to some how transform and change the lives of those people around me? I hate not knowing what my purpose is in life but that’s the one question that no one has the answers to and never will. There are people in this world that can have significant impacts on you, you were one of them. I will forever hold you dear to my heart. This is not our time, it may never be our time. Sometimes you meet people that you love but you are never meant to be with. We grow and learn from people, we all have stories of survival, we all have some form of wisdom or knowledge that we pass on to people, maybe that’s the soul purpose of us, maybe that is why I am here today.

Weightless

It’s just one day she wants, one day to feel weightless. The load she carries on her shoulders is beginning to break her back. The weight is felt through every inch of her body right into the core of her chest. Her heart hurts as her body struggles to fight against the weight. What will it take to lift this heavy load, what will it take to let go of this hell. She can’t say anything as she sinks to the ground. The burden she carries has taken her soul, all that remains is the empty life, the shell of a girl I had once known.

A Secular Society is Bullshit

A secular society is one that denounces attitudes, activities or other things, a country that has no religious or spiritual basis. This does not mean that the country doesn’t allow freedom, it just means as a country our principles are no religious based. However, the “all mighty God” dictates still to this day governmental policies. I don’t have issues with people believing in God; personally I don’t and never will as I can’t imagine living my life for anyone else but myself. The issues I have with religion is when it is often pushed onto people, just like has done so throughout the government.

Australia at the very beginning was not founded on the godly principles like so many people like to think. The spirituality of Indigenous folk is what was once spread throughout this land. The true and original Australia was then “founded” or (invaded as I like to call it) by convicts who killed thousands of Indigenous people, which still do this day affects the Indigenous Australian’s lives. If the government truly wanted to be a secular society then their policies would be a whole lot different. When Australia was finally graced with a Prime Minister who is atheist, unmarried and a woman, we thought we might have hit the jackpot. How wrong we were, not only has she proven to be inept in every way possible, but also she, her party and the opposing party have done little to nothing to change infuriating inequality that is spread throughout Australia.

Firstly to the obvious, the issue of gay marriage. Actually I wont call it “gay marriage” because it shouldn’t be needed to be labeled as gay marriage. I don’t go out and have a gay coffee, I go out and have a coffee. Just like those in countries that do allow marriage equality don’t go out and get gay married, they just get married. I understand is churches and religious folk don’t want to marry gay people, I get that, whatever but that doesn’t mean that marriage performed in a non religious way should be completely ruled out. Why should we let the small minority rule out something that is simply in essence one person declaring there love for another, in this already hateful world we live in why would someone want to stop something that provides hope and love for so many people.

It’s not just issues such as marriage inequality. Its things like abortion and euthanasia. I don’t understand why anyone would not allow a person to die if they were in so much pain. Euthanasia is allowing someone the freedom to die in a safe way. Imagine you are sitting next to your grandma in the hospital, she has terminal cancer, she is in pain, and she is eventually going to die. Now imagine she says she wants to die, because the pain is just to much to bear and no medication is working, Euthanasia offers her she the freedom to die peacefully and therefore reduce the length of time in which she has to lie in the hospital bed in pain. I know I would rather my grandma go peacefully and pain free if it meant she didn’t have to suffer any longer. I don’t understand why someone would disagree and would rather his or her grandma be forced into suffering longer.

Politics angers me, the world angers me and I’m sick of this supposed ‘secular’ society, it’s bullshit.

Unknown

You're there and she's there and I am here and I am scared. You have my heart. It has been placed in the care of your hands. With every thought i think i dig myself deeper into this pool of doubt that is in my mind. Most of all i just don't know and i hate the unknown. It scares me. I'm such a planned person and this is something i never planned for, you were the last thing on my mind.

Airport Death

I can know for certain that nothing will ever be certain again.
I hope that you lay awake at night and think of me the same way i think of you. You know you're messed up right? In some kind of beautiful way, you're really messed up. You say, "I'm still waiting on someone to save me", but that someone has got to be you and that goes for the same as me. You've completely destroyed me and I'm sitting here in pieces waiting for you to put me back together again. All the words i say to you, all the letters i send to you will never sum up what i feel for you. I don't believe in real love but i know I'm really in love with you, or maybe I'm, just in love with the idea of you. I never know if it's love or if it's just a feeling I'm predisposed to feel because society tells me so. When I'm with you it feels like days can roll into weeks in the blink of an eye. Everything we are not is simply everything we have not become, just yet. My list of things to do before i die is short and simple; survive.